I'm dreading the fact that when the dominoes guy comes, he will ask me if i placed an order under the name "high as shit".
i just farted in a meeting....took me completely by surprise.
so you made the shocked face and they caught you.
yup.
I mean I found and stalk his moms facebook.. that obsessed.
Just deleted any ex boyfriends and potential lovers from my phone in preparation for Vegas...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
apparently you can't crawl through the drive-thru window
I apologize for forcing you to look at my boob when we were high. It was uncalled for
Hickey on my chest, threw out my elbow and now walking out my shame.
Youre getting too old for this
My last two google searches are "shiny things" and "Ohio consent laws." you should visit more often.
Ugh. I guess I'm crying loudly or something. My mom just came in and gave me milk, chocolate, a Xanax, and her weed "for the break up blues". Her ways of affection are so odd.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Listen, unless you want to spend your birthday in a trunk, you better invite me
let me wake up, find my pants, and find out where i am tommorow and ill get back to you on that
Like wanna sit on your face while you speak German hot
She's got a shotglass necklace, running down the street asking people to "fill her up". Get here.
i just realized i have only had sex on couches so far this year. i can't decide if that's impressive or trashy
According to the office gossip the new secretary is “a homewrecking whore”. Think I should spend $27 on a fake wedding ring?
Yes! Want that picture of you and my nephew?
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