you want me
i'd rather choke on a dick.
My room smells like vodka and shame
Good luck man
I dont need it. Shes easy.
who do I fuck, the girl waiting for me upstairs or her roomate making me mac and cheese right now?? This is the single hardest decision I've always wanted to have to make
Mom's drinking. Just asked her if she was good to walk back to the condo. She seemed unsure until she remembered she brought the GPS. We are 2 blocks from the condo.
If I am going to throw out this whole "born again virgin" thing...i'm not going to do it on someone who is less than 5 inches.
I don't know if you remember, but I was only wearing an afghan.
Also, I found out tonight a major plus for being female is you can accidentally call the hot bartender sweet tits and she won't get mad.
Dont worry about getting me anything... Just put a bow on your ass.
Deal.
It's kind of like, standing in a garage and pretending you're a car. Except you're naked.
You know you are 86'd from the legacy right? You can't down shots then spike the shot glass
The profile of her ass is just unreal. Weird way to use profile I know, but never more accurate
I'm tired of the topic. I sent him a pic of my vagina to change it.
I JUST BROKE A NAIL MASTURBATING. WTF I could even enjoy my orgasm bc now I'm gonna have to spend $50 on my nails.
I guess what I'm trying to get to is that my dog sneezed on my dick earlier and its really taken the joy out of my evening.
Randomize
