I think youre just another guy trying to take advantage of a young naive innocent girl
you're not innocent... Once you have taken it in the turd cutter you can't label yourself innocent.
Strippers tramp stamp says "mom"
he asked me if i wanted "a hit" off his inhaler. its definitely time for a new roommate
He's got a pretty small dick but he's a total sweetheart. I'm gonna buy a new dildo and just deal with it.
Two questions: what are you doing RIGHT NOW? and do you know how to drive a golf cart?
There are only families here. I'm at the bar alone double fisting drinks. You cannot get any more approachable than I am now.
thanks for the 52 voicemails of you and crystal reciting the pleg of allegance
If this party got busted it would be an improvement
we have what I like to call an assload of ramen noodles
He's on the floor in just a Burberry tie. All my girl parts just tapped out.
This is not my bathroom and these are not my pants
As I was about to fuck him, he requested a moment of silence for Leonard Nimoy.
YO. MCGRIDDLES.
I know what I want to do this Friday. However, it might end in me getting kicked out of an arcade and a mini golf course.
I can’t believe the first text I’m sending you from this phone was about how I just got fingered in a smart car on tin can hill
Randomize
