At an apparent methhead hillbilly bar and was smiling for a pic when one toothless wonder screamed "look at all them teeth"!
i hit her car. ill just send her a farmville gift in the morning. then it'll be alright.
I need a therapist, but moreover we are going to be really drunk.
I think it may of been me pulling down my pants is why she walked away.
I'm a sociology major remember
Well that and comm
Basically you majored in how to get laid
Btw I don't have words to express my appreciation at how many times you've had to be on a dirty bar bathroom floor for me in the past two weeks
My whole sorority girl exterior is just a lie. I'm a fat tumblr girl on the inside.
Uh, he still talks to you after you basically sexually harassed him using emojis?
I'm on my way back with the wine... And a puppy. It was free.
If you're funny as hell and have a mustache, odds are I'm probably gonna fuck you
How does one go about breaking up with their bf on vacation?
im too broke to be in a relationship this close to the holidays
Your cock has been in the back of my throat. Co-worker is no longer a sufficient title. Fix that shit ASAP
I appreciate the fact that you sent me a snapchat of your dick soaking in a cup of water.
You just kept mumbling about the carpet being covered in stains that looked like the face of God. Until you decided that they were closer in relation to Dumbledore.
Randomize
