what if the hokey pokey really is what its all about?
I wish I could drop acid with the muppets
will power is for people who don't want to get laid
I feel bad for the person that has to clean the dishes that I peed on last night.
Just walked by a yard full of girls wearing bikinis. I did my best to stare.
I CAME AT YOU WITH RAW FEELING
you grabbed my dick through my pants and hissed at me.
Like. I probably should fuck him. I owe him for breaking his thumb.
For future reference, Twizzlers CAN leave welts.
Dude. I'm busy doing PR for America. FOR AMERICA. Europeans think we can't handle liquor.
With the drought our water bill is skyrocketing. No more shower sex, masturbating, or pretending to be under a water fall after smoking a blunt.
Come now. I'm bloody but I'll give you the best fuck of your life.
He balanced a treat on his nose, and then he rolled me a joint. My bf is the best pet ever.
The housekeeper found my huge dildo under the bathroom sink, and another in the living room. I can't get much more single than this.
I can't decide if I miss drinking or you, they are so closely connected.
He brought me a bottle of Jack, got me off 3 times, & then left. This is the best fakelationship ever!
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