Well, ive pounded a baby into a stripper and a girl who was on jerry springer, a 16 year old is logically next.
a cemetary is a place for people to rest in peace and you just spermed all over their land
He is offering to pay me back by sending me a dick pic.
.......................................
My thoughts exactly.
It was honestly like he was directing a porno or something. he kept telling different people to grab other people's boobs, it was all very artistic.
His and hers buttplugs were a resounding success. Tru luv
Would you mind pretending to be lesbians just for like three emails?
THEIR PENISES MATCH. I JUST REALISED THAT. THEY HAVE IDENTICAL DICKS. OH GOD.
moms trying to set me up with a 28 year old. hes graduated university like im getting high in my bed and he's an adult
And the next morning he asked me why I had clothes on so I said so that he could take them off again.
He said he "doesnt care at all, really" if I shave my legs or not. Challenge accepted.
He's bringing a lesbian pretending to be his girlfriend to family Christmas. I can not wait to see how this goes.
STOP BUYING ALADDIN PANTS WITH MY AMAZON CREDIT CARD
For the record you're an amazing lay and you have great taste in breakfast sandwiches
I'm going to make you a sign to put on your penis to ward others off
He almost got to me tonight but then I was like fuck it I'm going to dance with a teli-tubby on the bar so fuck you
Randomize
