i was shrooming and she was sobbing. i was trying to be sympathetic, but i could see the veins working like worms under her skin. and then her face stripped down to the muscle.
what was she crying about?
i wanna say it was the lack of skin on her face but maybe she lost her job.
There are some college kids out at 4 in the morning dragging each other on a sled behind a bike. its too entertaining to call the cops
we're on our way back. she tried to pants the waiter again.
You have to keep an eye on her tonight cause you know how she likes to pickpocket people when she's drunk.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Why are there hooting douchebags outside my building? Did a sport happen again?
Welcome to the south, dude. Gives the phrase "I wish you a dry ass" a new perspective.
As sure as my left ball is bigger then my right. We will have our moment.
So, settle a debate for my housemates. Have you measured your dick. And how long. Results Will not be disclosed
Oh and an honorable mention for your father's porn collection. Things I'll never forget.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He's getting so into these sexts, I hate to tell him I'm fully clothes, watching Bring It On and eating chips and salsa.
Man, I'm real high and googling what all my favorite figure skaters from childhood are doing now.
I'm glad I date someone who likes the simple things. Sex, kittens, and McDonald's.
His dick has the same name as my pipe. I'm keeping him forever.
You were so drunk Last night you asked for your glasses so you could read the directions on a band aid
Okay. Did I say I did anything unusual? Because I usually do weird stuff. Did I clean mirrors? My mirrors are really clean, and I think I remember having windex..
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