do you think my med school application would be worse off if "I like helping others and shit" slipped into an essay I emailed last night?
Don't tits with veins remind you of road maps?
drunk me is my new role model. he's fearless. like not even afraid of tornadoes.
What's the point of having 3 fuck buddies when their periods all seem to sync up
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It was everywhere, it looked like he just took the leftovers and threw them around the bathroom... Festively...
I legitimately sent him a storybook of naked pictures.
You beat him at the shot competition, and proceeded to rub it in while telling everyone to "ASK ME A MATH QUESTION!!!"
Dude, it's the frankincense and myrrh soap. Smelling like baby Jesus will get you laid.
If you haven't gone to the store yet. Can you PLEASE get me some clippers my balls will thank you later
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
how do you not remember that?! you winked at the bouncer and then proceeded to grind on him while chugging a beer. i don't know if i should be proud or embarrassed to be your friend
I just want to pat him on the head, bake him some cookies, and reassure him that, someday, he will get laid.
You should know two things about me,,,1) I am highly sexual and 2) I am HIGHLY competitive so you telling me about how much sex you had with the other girl makes me say "challenge accepted"... you should hydrate.
I just farted so loud someone came to check on me. Thought something fell in my office.
Just shaved my crotch so I could call it the bald eagle. Happy 4th.
I'm owning this being a social human being thing tonight!