I just spent the last hour reading customer reviews on amazon.com for the book "it hurts when I poop." Send help.
I then asked the hardee's employee: mam, do you mind if i pay 75 cents in cash and then put the 1.13 on my debit card.
His facebook says he is a fan of "underwater handjobs"
It's official, I've know hooked up with everyone I carpooled with in middle school
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
is it bad that I didn't wash the cum out of my hair because it keeps my curls intact?
Chuck job is nothing more than to be my dick stand when I'm too drunk to hold it while pissing
these are times I'm glad I'm Jewish because the Torah is just like "drink, eat, and fuck"
If I could run through a field of Reece's and Oreos, dive off a milkfall into a bowl of cereal. My Life would complete.
The sad part is I didn't even want to get laid. I just wanted the emotional connection, but my vagina was screaming "TOUCH ME. TOUCH ME RIGHT NOW BECAUSE MY DADDY ISSUES ARE MUCH DEEPER THAN MY EMOTIONAL NEEDS!" Vodka has a way of getting me out of my emotions and gets me fucked every time.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Made eye contact with his twin sister the day after he gave me a lifechanging blowjob. Do you think she knows?
You threw up with such class too! Tiara and all.
she chased shots of jack with a fucking steak. i'm in love.
I think my dick has healed enough that we can start having sex again
I knew the bike rally would be fun when I saw "male pole dancing" on the schedule
be the chaos you wish to see in the world...
i'm trying to figure out how to respond to that in text
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