So his roomate was eating breakfast when I was sneaking out. He's the guy I took home from jessicas wedding. I ended up eating coco puffs with him
Just another sign I need to get out of this town
I am about to get in a knife fight over a corn dog.
Maybe she gives good head
A girl who still calls a dick a "wiener"cannot possibly give good head
Tears do usually get me what I want. That and oral sex.
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I keep finding coffee grounds in my vagina
Woke up this morning to my mom on the phone with my dad saying, "It's probably just your prostate." Reasons to move out. Go.
dude, i woke up with a mini keg on my night stand. again. like wtf
I'm sitting here in nothing but my panties, eating beef jerky and reese's for breakfast.Today is not the day to expect me to make sound life decisions.
You crawled everywhere and rolled in ice cream. No more vodka for a month.
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This is a rough morning for me
No, rough is puking in your froyo cup next to a five year old and her grandma.
If the fate of the world hinged on some chubby girl getting laid, the president would dispatch me with a fifth of Jameson immediately and then rest easy.
not sure what the chiropractor did but my junk deserves a cape now.
I went home with him again and he LEFT HIS OWN HOUSE at 2 in the morning while I was IN THE BATHROOM.
I just wish he would stop trying to bring his emotional baggage into our sexual relationship.
Wearing my one sleeve dress...thought you'd like to know I shaved ONE armpit lol
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