curled up in a ball on my bed listening to my "cuddle with a boy" playlist. prettty high.
Well i tried snorting sugar. so either that made me puke or the fact that i drank water from a fish tank
You know this who 'I show my love by being a total dick' thing is getting old, right?
If you're staying here tonight, you need to promise me you won't make another bonfire in the lounge room. My girl is still pissed about that.
She said she had a surprise for me and sent me a video of her having sex with some fat dude. It was a mood killer
See,its just the last time this situation happened I ended up hiding in a closet on my birthday
all a girl really needs is a few good pair of leggings and a drug dealer that delivers.
I just bought a 1/4 oz of pot from a coworker who's old enough to be my grandfather...I'm never leaving Portland.
I'm about to have a threesome at the hotel where I had my quinceañera. Becoming a woman under this roof for the second time, whaaat
Did you just email Kelly and I gay dinosaur erotica?
Oh the best part of having sex with him was that he made me a smoothie after
You looked at the bouncer while you pissed on the front door of the bar and said...who the fuck are you?
YOU WILL GIVE ME MASHED POTATOES OR I WILL RIP YOUR SOUL INTO 7 PIECES AND YOU WILL TURN INTO LORD VOLDEMORT
i fucked his best friend. once right next door to him. i'm pretty sure that could be called sweet revenge.
I love you so much and not just because your dick is perfect
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