im just going to superglue mistletoe to my forehead and see what happens
We're exchanging pot brownie recipes in my substance abuse class. This is going to be an awesome 7 weeks.
Currently coming up with judgment, the game. Works well on buses, will probably be more entertaining in bars.
there is a money trail leading from my bathroom to my living room.. the trail ends with a half eaten bag of chips with a note that says "magical chipz".. who am i?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Yeah bro I don't know how she's gonna explain the black eye, how else do you tell your boss "my knee hit me in the face during sex last night"
he had me stop mid-blow job to make me use my phone to id a song on the radio..
i wasnt really sure how to responde to that.
Just saw a drunk bitch in the west village peeing on a car. You are not alone.
Mainly I just wanna pet bunnies. And purple chicks. Well any color chicks if I close my eyes. But purple if I open them.
Explain the King Dong next to my face.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We found Mulan.
I thought you were in bed what the hell
we fucked and then he hand fed me a hot pocket
I just showed this kid my nipples to work my shift tmw
Every time I try to do something productive I end up searching ghost porn.
For some reason drunk me always leaves sober me a banana in the morning.
Ha. Yeah that's all I found you with this morning. Butt ass naked w my robe across your lap and your arms thrown back in handcuff position.
Randomize