I like you better when you drink
I like you better when I drink too
Went to bed at 4 in a strangers bed. woke up wearing scrubs, realized i was gonna be late for work so i just wore the same clothes as the day before... i don't have a toothbrush and im pretty sure there is leftover semen in my mouth. at some point i think i was at the beach cuz theres is sand in my underwear. i love newport already.
I woke up hungover and reached for a glass of water only to realize too late that it was vodka sprite with my splooge in it.
I just threw up while getting a haircut. I'm never trying to accomplish stuff with a hangover again.
Went to the career fair today..I handed out many resumes to find out later that they say I have a bachelor o farts degree...Top that.
Just tried to fight the dj at cowboys because he would'nt play freebird. Pick me up now.
Like if there was an award for best way to take a girls virginity, he would get a standing ovation. And first prize. Probably a bunch of roses too. That good.
I feel I should make it clear.....I'm not stalking you, I'm stalking ur dick. You don't even need to talk when you get here. At 4am I think we'd both prefer that anyway.
I asked you if you needed a ride and you kept saying "no, my name is katelyn"
usual friday morning routine. the pants i wore last night are in my passenger seat and im rooting through the pockets trying to make exact change at the dunkin donuts drive thru
Thank you for deleting me from Instagram. Also, I'm carrying your child. Happy new year!
She came out of my bathroom wearing nothing but high top Converse, a leather jacket and a tongue stud. I love rock bars.
I got laid two nights in a row
And none for Gretchen Wieners...
I just sat on the floor of my shower for 20 minutes to punish myself for drunk me's decisions.
I just got the high sucked out of me. Fuck.
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