That's kind of creepy but I guess since I'm wearing your dad's pants nothing is off limits anymore
this girl is running around outside screaming, it's creaming on me! it's creaming on me. I totally have to find my video camera
I have a question, if it paid really well, like ridiculously well, would you be a restaraunts under the table resident blowjob girl?
I wouldn't necessarily say I'm in her pants...I'd say I'm more on the on ramp to the freeway to the long way to her pants. There really isn't a short cut.
Well, at first I was really confused. But then I realized that he was talking from his penis's perspective... in third person.
I'm hoping he'll tell everyone how great in bed I am. Well, how great in bathroom floor I am.
That's what I'm here for. To bitch slap you into believing in yourself.
WHY IS HE GONE WHEN I ACTUALLY HAVE THE AMOUT OF ESTROGEN TO HUMP A SQUIRREL?!?!
But how will the next generation learn about life choices without a Jersery Shore?
I think I may be the only girl in the world that can say she has fallen asleep grasping a penis..... 3 different times...... 3 different penises
You walked up to me, grabbed my face and said "I just peed in the sink!"
I responded with "neat-o burrito" to his SEXT...he tried so hard and I just panicked.
My girlfriend is talking to my ex-boyfriend at the bar right now. I REPEAT, GIRLFRIEND IS TALKING TO EX BOYFRIEND RIGHT NOW. GET ME THE FUCK OUT OF THIS PLAACE
Tinder in Coventry is like browsing a gallery of mugshots from Azkaban
The couple in the apartment next to mine are both opera singers. I’m never sure if I’m hearing them banging or doing vocal warm-ups.
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