Different chick, same blowjob, same parking lot.
Every time my boyfriend threatens to commit suicide I change my relationship status as "widowed".
how do i tell him I'm always in the mood without sounding like a slut?
For some reason 'start yourself on fire drunk' isn't nearly as funny after last 4th of july..
good news. according to wikipedia, my blackout might just have been "post-trauma amnesia"
I'm doing this for my boobs. They miss him.
I would not wish his dick upon my worst enemy
We were just talking bout putting on helmets and going fo a car ride just to see how ppl react. I will def fit in here haha
Where did this racoon skin hat, stop sign and bag full of tacos come from?
Narnia or $5 pitcher night either way
First of all you can never say anal too much. Second I now think you're a total gentleman.
Rarely has that paragraph ever been put together
im lying in bed trying to choke myself out because being awake hurts too much
I COULD BREAK CONCRETE WITH MY FOOTBALL ERECTION.
I just used a thesaurus to write a sext...
Also day 6: dick is healed and ready to go back to work.
He kept apologizing that the nerve damage makes him take a while to finish. Meanwhile he gave me 3 orgasms and a leg cramp
Only you could benefit from a reckless driver
Randomize
