The way white people respond to them, you'd think Journey was the president of Caucasia.
Sam from lord of the rings is 10 yards away from me, i am creaming myself.
i think he drugged the pie. i'll get back to you on that later.
Apparently there was a point in the night that they literally thought he was dead, ass naked on the floor. That bad.
I was in the bathroom puking up mountains of tequila and when he came to help me, I held the door shut and kept yelling at him to let me be a lady.
And then he told me he was too tired for me to suck his dick. Physically and mentally too tired for me to suck his dick. What the fuck?
Dude I was taking a shower and I kept looking down at the drain expecting Mario to come up, yell "It's a me, Mario!", tickle my balls, and go back down the drain.
I was mixing candy canes and coors light and was in a great place.
The taxi driver was going on about how many drunk chicks want to sleep with him when he drives them home. Not sure if he was bragging or hinting
I disagree, if your last name is Weiner then the sending of dick pics should be mandatory. I'd give him a pass.
Saw a girl outside my apartment shotgun a bud light, then a red bull, get in her Tahoe, and drive 4 people away. Gotta love thirsty Thursday.
Let me be the vehicle for you to live out your slutty half-gay dreams.
I finished masturbating now I'm eating french toast crunch. What is life, and what are friends.
Shes the whorey leader of that wolf pack, and all the less whorey wolves report back to her. She teaches them the ways
I know you do it only because of my toyota, but thank you for fucking me. Seriously.
Randomize
