the pool opens at 11. by 1115 the ambulance had been called.
I no longer want to be the gay that plays in the revolving door at RelationshipDale's like a seven year old with a.d.d.
I just put on my hot pinky lace thong... you know what that means! ;)
Oh god. Slutty you is on the run. Someone needs to alert the city.
so after he got his stomach pumped, he asked for a smoking room.
she just made a shot glass out of magazine paper. I love her.
She opened a beer bottle with her armpit and then gave me a cigarette from the waistband of her underwear. I dont know if I want to be her or marry her.
I should probably file for unemployment. Sometime between last night and 4 AM I facebooked my manager the lyrics to hoe by ludacris. I'm just projecting ahead here.
It just gets louder and louder too...dear god. Her poor vagina.
We should give each other good-luck-on-your-finals head in the morning.
I had her buy me a cock ring, so we might test that out. We are presently playing yahtzee.
Cock rings and yahtzee. Like peanut butter and jelly.
I thought adderall would sober me up, but it did NOT.
YAS. BRING CRAB.
Knew i was going to puke. So i grabed a bowl out of the kitcken in the dark before bed...Ended up puking into a spaghetti strainer...
I walked over and you were apologizing to him because you're lady gaga and he's not. The best part was that he forgave you.
It's dangerous to be this horny at work. I'm gonna stain my desk chair
Randomize
