as veruca salt said, "i want it now!"
uhh im not your indulgent father, stoned and im in the middle of making tacos. right now, tacos win
No one goes out in public like that, unless they do anal
I just overhead some girl saying that she's trying out for the real world so she has a backup if she doesn't get into teach for america...
I cannot convey how much I really do love Chris Hansen. FYI: he is the JC Chasez of my adult years.
It's true- you can buy beer at McDonald's in France. I'm not coming back to the States.
How was the bike ride?
Nope. High in the basement. Fruit cups.
Fuck now we have to have sex
What?
In a bet, need to win
you were mass sexting so we took your phone away
when she first told me she hooked up with him my initial response was to shout "WE HAVE SOMETHING IN COMMON!"
He said he was going to "rock my world". I wonder if he too has a false sense of confidence and accomplishment stemming from a complete lack of honesty from our own female counterparts.
Yeah but I was the kid who ran over your BMW and is banging your 15 year old daughter... There isn't a cool enough dad in the world to make that work.
I'm expecting you to come by soon and a magical night of sex and floating on clouds to follow.
btw telling the cab driver, that took you to your booty call that is now returning your wallet that you left in his cab, that you want to hug him is awkward
I just felt emotion and I'm not okay with it
I finally selected an outfit that says "I'm not easy" but still shows off the tittays.
Randomize
