can you buy anything in the cafeteria for less than $2? I spent the last of my laundry money on a chia pet
Is it just me, or does Colt McCoy look like Herbie the Dentist from "Rudolph the Red-nosed Reindeer"?
you know you made some mistakes when your last two boyfriends are both obsessed with women's curling...
he put listerine on his cock to make the taste more "enjoyable"... i think hes a keeper.
And by that I mean I told her the plot of the first batman movie as my life and it took her like 20 minutes to figure it out
She called me her ex's name in a supermarket. How boring am I that she livens up shopping by thinking of another guy?
when you tell me you got me a birthday present, I have to assume it will show up in a drug test.
still finding ketchup in my shoes. thanks to graduation that is probably the last time ill ever say that..
There are too many people and smells in this elevator for my hangover to handle.
Youre attempt to ruin my night by putting Date Rape by Sublime on my sex playlist failed. She was into it.
It's like bringing a chick home from the bar the night before and waking up to thinking you are about to go another round... Just to wake up and find she's already left...
sooo trippy being back in town after 5 years. if you had asked me in high school who would be future coke heads, i would have been way off
I gotta stop fucking the bouncers. We are running out of bars to go to.
I could be the Kenny Powers of Sex Therapists.
momentary stint on a second floor library computer...guy next to me snorted blue adderall off his notebook through a cut straw, i cant tell if this guy is my hero or just plain crazy...
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