I just realized that this morning is the first morning i've put on underwear in a week.
I love summer.
he just flicked a booger into my mouth and shouted "goaaaal!"
I just got a drinking merit badge from a slutty girl scout
And then I chipped his tooth because I got too into it. Helloo, single life.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
As I was going down on her I noticed she had a tatoo on her inner thigh that said "Eat it like your birthday cake".
He doesn't like you, he likes u not having a gag relfex
Honestly, your dog is in better hands with that homeless guy.
i just added your friend Valery on the FB just to comment on your tits.... thought id give you a heads up
Just remembered i had an ordained minister bless my booze last night.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i just honestly didn't believe you when you said your brother was a fucking clown. ho shit you weren't kidding.
I am just saying if Clark Kent walks into your life, you fuck him
fuck you and your stupid hot as hell face
But that's fine. Because I am an independent woman who is going to pull some jane Goodall shit and save the world one day......or be a porn star......either way they are going to wish they had fucked me.
You showed me your butthole that's like a mating call in other species
the fact that you beer bonged rum made me so proud, the fact that you threw up an entire footlong tuna melt after... not so much babe
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