In my 8 am class there was a pack of birth control on the board with a note saying, "Some dude somewhere is unhappy."
What happened?....
He lifted up the blanket, and whispered "Don't do it" to his sperm....
Can we please just celebrate being alive this far into the school year and just get drunk?
Yes, she did suck your dick in the bathroom to wake you up.
I petted my head, told my hair it felt beautiful and needed to be let free. Then pulled out my pony tail. Cheers to weed. I lose.
Holy hangover, going dancing with family good idea, taking the last shot with the transvestite bar owner not so much...
Any chance you used one if the curtain rods in the fireplace room as a sword? One is missing
I don't miss having sex with him. We had our finale fuck last week. He's all yours now.
you know i have almost 1500 fb friends but not ONE drunk booty call?
I couldn't fall back asleep it was too bright so I just took my sports bra off and put it over my eyes
I told him about the time I blacked out and shit myself and he still wanted to have sex with me that night. Feeling pretty optimistic about where this fling is going.
Sweet! It'll be a "that-minor-I-used-to-serve-alcohol-to-is-no-longer-a-minor" party!!!
I put purple lights under my bed and asked him if he wanted to fuck in a spaceship.
I don't particularly remember setting a firecracker off in my hand. No more tequila.
I’m getting reeeeaaalll tired of telling cute boys I gave them chlamydia.
That’s two in three months. You really know how to live.
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