no but I have been chillin' like em' homeboys in the rainforest yo!
I woke up with my 26er down my pants and a peice of paper stuck to my forehead with gum that said "tell it to the greek goddess beside me"
i think beer pong is the only time ive ever found a use for geometry
She said i kept moaning her moms name instead of hers
Puked up what appears to be battery acid next to the treadmill. Everyone noticed.
heres the thing, we have 120 cans of beer left in the fridge. until thats finished we cant fit food in the fridge
As far as figuring life out your talking to a guy that's alternating text messages between his baby mama and a drunk bitch I met tailgating. My best advice is don't worry about shit out of your control and always and I really mean ALWAYS wear a condom.
He always finds the good stuff. He's like a truffle pig for bud.
We always end up having sex in random places after class. I need to stop letting this dude borrow my pens.
Are the transvestites working the counter tonight? Last time I was there they gave me love advice.
Did body shots with a guy... Ended up being the ref of my volleyball game... So that's why we won
But forealz I'm gonna need a solid 52 orgasms so hydrate.
We were making fun of some people having sex on the beach, an hour later we were having sex on a golf course
I brought her cheeseburgers and tequila but she's still mad at me.
YOU CANT JUST BLOW GUYS BC THEY’RE NICE TO YOU LEXI
I CAN IF I WANT TO
Randomize
