wakey wakey hands off snakey
The midget we rented got so drunk last night he got carted off in an ambulance
I dont even clean my room anymore .. i drunk proof it for when i come back smashed with a guy
He sent me $300 worth of sex toys. My clitoris went into hiding after two days.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
someone who i have in my phone as thundercock just said he was DTF
There's sex hanging in the air like a pinata. European people are no joke.
If I wake up with an unknown penis in me one more time I am literally going to press charges to the makers of tequila.
Today's work quote "if I looked like you, I'd be sitting on everyones face"
I'm in the sex attic, crying, eating french toast and taco
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I give you full permission to seriously injure me the next time I think it's a good idea to face a bottle of vodka
I don't know, I kept pretending that I was riding an elephant during. It was actually really fun, but you can't tell him that!
You can see my drunken state get worse with each picture
He gave me the award for most entertaining blow job. That should count for something.
I did not know male screamers existed until now. Good for him. Good for my ego.
Skipping class. Wanna Drink now?
yea. just give me 15 min to write a paper.
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