I will die if light touches me.
I just saw how many times I called you last night. You're welcome.
i just hate vaginas for liking penis's insside them
keep an eye on me. i'm afraid that after a few more drinks i'll ask to borrow his wheelchair.
The cab driver just showed us a POV shot of himself getting ridden by a chick he took with his flip phone. Confirmed not taken in cab. Gonna be a good night...
Now back to adults eating hotdogs.
It was like inception, a dream, in a dream, in the back of a dodge charger.
His hair looked like he was in a bukaki and then got a perm right after
In the middle of having sex she stopped, said "guess what, it's clitoris awareness week" and then continued fucking me
Also I've been at work for an hour and I've already been "honey"d "babe"d and "beautiful"d by three separate men. Apparently hungover with yesterdays make up looks good on me.
He said he didnt want to choke me, I said im sorry thats a deal breaker.
Its 11am and I'm eating gummi bears and drinking Tennessee honey in my underwear...this is why I'm self employed
I need you to teach me how to be roommates with somebody I'm not fucking.
I have vodka, fruit gushers, and health insurance. Let's party.
i out mim tonsoeep
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