Awesome. Ask her out.
Nope. She's got a detail of ed hardy security around her.
Yes because finding a guy to give head to is pretty difficult.
I mean not really
Obviously that's why it was a joke you are so stupid it's impossible.
i just woke up at 8pm naked in my bed, with a fresh haircut. I wonder what barber i went to.
I said I wanted my dignity back. He brought my thong to me after sharpie-ing "dignity" on the front. I'm not sure if I should me mad or impressed.
You have not lived until you've seen your mother stumble into the house with one shoe on mumbling incoherently about tequila cupcakes.
5am update: in a toga seeing triple made out with both sexes
Your girlfriend is in jail- I've just never been able to use that in a sentence before. Thank you both!
Well that's the first time I've woken up with wet jorts
You held an empty wine bottle to your head and declared yourself the "wine unicorn." For the rest of the night you galloped everywhere and whenever anyone refused to be a wine unicorn with you, you tried to spear them with the bottle.
Our night has progressed to doing coke off a laundry machine through a parking ticket
When you wake up to a porn star on your couch telling you, you better tell your boyfriend about last night.
He's such a neat freak that he started making the bed while I was still laying on it naked. He succeed in case you were wondering.
the next morning we realized we didnt speak the same language... guess i subconsciously did learn a little german last semester. thanks study abroad.
ah the experiences a semester in Vienna can give you. Frau would enjoy knowing that even while sleeping during class you still managed to learn enough german to get laid
How many weight watcher activity points do you think sex is worth?
He just compared fucking my vagina to a snow flake falling on his forehead: gentle.... I'm not sure if that's a compliment or not.
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