It's fine actually... I'm pretty sure he had the crookedest weiner in the world anyway.
Like he had it hanging in the wind and you just decided, "nope, I don't think that one's for me." ????
God no! I could just feel it. His clock said it was 8:00 when, clearly, it should have been midnight.
She left me with blue balls so I jerked off on her french toast in the morning.
His penis was definitely too big to be the type that wants commitment. Shit.
I don't remember anything other than how good it felt when I peed my pants.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
uhh when the x-ray tec was moving your head you licked his hand and meowed.. i think he knew you weren't sober
You picked a jagger girl up claimed her then walked out the door with her that was the last we saw of you
I should just black out in my front yard again- that was a great nights sleep.
its cute though when you google his name more than one mug shot comes up from different states
He told me that if I were a guy he'd go gay for me. Honestly don't know how to take that.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm at work. It's margarita night. Someone literally just shouted "MURICUH!"
God bless us, everyone.
He just kept yelling cup my balls to everyone they kicked us out after 20 min
Hypothetical Question: Would you take a cougar bullet for me?
The lady at target couldn't scan my grocery item and just looked at me and said "just take it. I hate this fucking place". Best munchie adventure yet.
I just feel like I'm worth a little bit more than your recycled nudes...
he told me he liked me . I thought we were just fuck buddies . This ruins everything!
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