i just sat at a stop sign for 10 minutes waiting for it to turn green. i need to STOP SMOKING THIS SHIT.
She wouldn't stop saying her own name. Like a damn pokemon.
well right now he's telling us a story how he befriended a racoon
So the bar isnt gonna put that broken window on my tab. appaerently they want cash
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Convinced lucas all the eggs in the fridge are fertilized and now he's crying.
I'm drinking and working out! I'm bench pressing the beer pong table and doing push ups and lifting the chair.
You realize we were screaming in the car about our apartment next year because we can "bring home randoms whenever we want" and "stare at each other from our door ways"
Whoops. I'm a horrible gf, I dropped the "I'm looking for jobs in a different city" bomb before I wished him a happy anniversary
Thinking of someone think of me while masturbating while I masturbate. & that's how the over thinkers do it ✌️
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He left for work so I drank pickle juice from his fridge
I think the pizza delivery guy is getting a handjob next door.
I just choked eating whip cream from the can, and peed a little because I was coughing so hard. How am I still single.
Well we can add this to the list of 'where the hell did that bruise come from?'
Standing naked in my kitchen making nachos. I love my youth.
I sent her a dick pic and used brett Favre's dick pick. She asked me why I had pictures of old men's dicks saved on my phone... I just can't win bro
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