Are you missing anything? I found a wedding ring in my bed this morning.....
Guess what? I had way too much to drink today. I'm properly wasted. Doing chores and playing video games while drunk. It's the nexus of stupidity and responsibility.
This morning when you woke up you looked like one of the Wii Bowling people. I think it was the eyebrows combined with the sambuca
The new google images is a smorgasbord of porn now are plans for tonight are off.
Totally just projectile vomited while ridind a bicycle.
Just had sex with your cousin. That's what you get for throwing away a perfectly good microwave. Hopefully you learned from this experience.
I can't believe that 100lb chick tackled me through a flight of stairs
ive penciled you in for a day of excessive drinking
Just high enough for therapy.
What happened to my knees?
You ate shit in front of the homeless people. They applauded.
I'm just trying to absorb as much of the fluids from the carpet as I can.
this old dude from the bar is giving me a ride home in a van, his bumper sticker says " don't laugh your kids could be in here" scary world ou here
we had a "who's sex playlist is better?" fight.....
what the fuck happend anyway? How did it go from smoothies after work to blacking out?
He may have been a dick but he DID give me his Netflix log in. Maybe some good did come of it.
Randomize
