I feel like I'm in dance class right now
Can I use cash for clunkers to trade in her boobs for a new set of 18 year old tits?
Its worth a shot.
you were so drunk you slurred your pauses
Let's go to weight watchers and eat in front of them.
Are you pissed because you didn't get action, or the fact i got boned twice in public places tonight?
Fastest blow job ever. Though it was probably a good thing since we were in front of my house.
Taped crackers to the wall. Sat I'n the dryer. Bobby had to pull me out by my hair. No more.
Have you ever had one of those moments when you kept whispering to yourself "I'm not a slut, I'm not a slut..."?
I'm sitting at work trying to dust glitter off my pants. I can't hang out with her anymore.
Sleeping with random people is the same as soul searching, right? Ps that wasn't a team name suggestion.
I started blowing him in North Dakota, and I finished the job in Minnesota. Oh, the places road head can take you.
She came 4 times, called me a god, then made me breakfast. I don't think she is ever going to leave
Naked and Afraid: Hangover edition
I just made mac at 3:10 am... My life is falling apart...
She used to be cute, back when we were young.
Oh well, so were platform jellies. Shit changes.
Randomize