guy in the car over is getting some terrible road head. he just gave me a thumbs down when he noticed i was watching.
So I fucked that hot french guy last night
You do know he's the one who threw up on our table, right? You get to clean it up.
I found him in the livingroom trying to soak up broken glass with the clock from the kitchen.
The great thing about skinny blondes is that they're all interchangeable.
you might as well be a hobo. you were covered in pee last night hanging out on the stairs drunk.
right. well we all have our lows.
Doing lines of coke with a $100 dollar bill off a 6in x 9in photo of your childhood self really tells you where you where you've gotten in life.
He got violent drunk so we have to untie him in the morning. He's in your basement and you're out of electrical tape. Don't forget because I will.
If I get laid dressed as one of the McPoyle twins, I deserve all the medals.
I have to shower first, I forgot I peed on my feet last night...
Can we just smoke a few bowls and eat grilled cheese while drunk in our hotdog suits at 9am ?
Fine line between drunken accidental sleepover with your best friend's lab partner and gay sexathon. I did a cartwheel over that line. A CARTWHEEL THAT LANDED IN HIS LAP
Yeah. I'm so over work, that I'm not even satisfied pretending to work anymore. I just flat out want to go home. Fuck this job
Will you remind me I changed my hotspot phone password to fuckyouprivilegedwhitedude
If we're going to communicate going forward, you'll need to be versed in Gillian Anderson.
So I wore my ankle step-counter exercise thingy while I rode him. Don't fuck him- I only burned .2 pounds.
Randomize
