Wine floats aren't as good of an idea as they seem
Well if you're drunk enough to make some mistakes this week I'd be down to redeem myself for my poor performance.
His search history includes homemade sex toys and a plunger. I'm scared about what goes on in their place.
A horseman, i repeat, a man on a horse downtown just told me i was gorgeous and my friends were not. Not drunk enough.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If you're not going to call the girls I bring around by name, at least don't call them by number. It's been cockblocking since girl #47. Dick.
Im hitting on this chick at a stoplight when all the sudden. i notice this chick blowing some dude in the backseat.
Nothing shouts "I'm single" like a thousand needlepoint pillows.
I'm ready to get married, then we can lie around watching anime and eating pizza while he rubs baby oil on me
I can't believe i lost my ID... bringing my birth certificate to the club was a weird experience
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't know what's worse the fact that I woke up with a clit piercing or the fact that I didn't pay for it.
She is 6 months pregnant and gets more action at bars than I do.
I just need to find someone whose kink is financial submission.
I don't know if I'm dying or this is just a mild inconvenience
Before making travel and hotel reservations to meet your "affair" for the first time, consult your menstrual calendar! $633 wasted!
I HATE BEING THIS HIGH FML IT'S LIKE I'M MAKING UP FOR ALL THE 4:20S I DIDNT DO ALL AT ONCE
Randomize