Is it bad that when my prof gave examples of "stalking" behavior, I either have done or would do most of them?
How did the whale quest end up? I saw u hit a little snag when the first one heard you call her that.
I have no recollection of sleep choking you
Things you owe me: a sober apology, $12, the removal of bbq sauce from my doorknob
So burnt out. Like weed hangover. And someone just fell through the ceiling outside of my class. How's your morning going?
WHY DO I WANT TO FUCK EVERY GUY THAT BREATHES
Btw he dated my mom. You're Eskimo siblings with my mom. Good job.
The most humiliating part was that I farted while he was tasing me.
I feel like I should throw some tampons around my workspace so everyone will know what's really going on
To be honest I've become too lazy for the work involved in getting laid.
You run marathons and you're too lazy for sex? Priorities, man.
Touche.
You will drink beer in a kiddie pool in your back yard but you wont bring a girl home
EITHER I'M HIGH OR JUST REACHED A NEW LEVEL OF SINGLE FEMALE SADNESS BECAUSE THIS BROWNIE IS GIVING ME ORGASMS
CODE RED CODE RED MY VIBRATOR IS BROKEN THIS IS NOT A DRILL
I'm not coming to work today because tequila
He was standing in the living room wearing a Donald Trump wig and looking very disappointed
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