How did you manage that?
Told her it wasn't GENITAL herpes... just ORAL herpes... on my penis
lol... jersey girls rock
this is the second time this summer that a girl has called me a ken dol
you shouldn't let them see you without your pants on
I am totally the chick from Intervention who barfs up wine and then re-eats it.
I just got cut off for correcting the bartender's grammar. I should have never accepted that fucking editors position.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Yeah, I just met her and we got arrested together. I think it was a good bonding experience.
Yeah, the furnace guy just pulled out 4 empty and 1 full beer bottle from the vent. You are no longer allowed over.
Oh you know, sitting here in my bathing suit watching antiques road show and petting the cat. Just the usual
I feel like I'm going to shit out a Big Mac
I've literally exhausted all the videos on pornhub. It took like 4 years, but I've done it. I did that quicker than I finished college
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If we try hard enough and believe in ourselves, we can still make it to Wendy's before they close
I thought since you asked to see my dick I might as well say hi
Have you ever been so high that you felt like corduroy? I'm at that level.
Teach me the ways of your demonic sorcery.
Adderal can only make me focus so much. Your ass is stronger than my medicine. Congratulations.
One day he'll find out I do drugs and stop talking to me.
What will you do then?
Drugs, probably.
Randomize