I don't care how ugly she is, I can't turn down a free movie +bj. In this economy that's downright irresponsible
The only coherent words in the 6 texts i recieved were don't, cute, fucking, beer, and lions
Well he's not exactly single.. It's like an open relationship his wife doesn't know about
Guess who won bingo at the senior center and is going to jail all in the same night?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
dude, my ass and shoulder hurt from that kayak last night... note to self: wood planks holding kayak from ceiling do not also hold up a human being
I been sleeping but occasionally wake up feeling like tiny elves are in my throat ripping my esophagus to shreds with their bare hands.
Somehow, you made that sound extremely magical and not at all painful.
Straight guys just can't stay away. My penis must have pheromones or something.
This is why Helen Keller didn't drink
Quick question: is it impolite to pause sex to put on my knee brace?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I peppersprayed myself last night. Sigh.
there are not enough nopes in the world for that situation.
How does one get out of sexting without being rude? I'm trying to watch Downtown Abbey
He started me on Celexa. I think I feel like Bjork. Is that normal?
Like... my feet feel like little octopuses, and they want to swim to the next room.
you know you need to get laid when: getting wrestled to the ground in a self-defense class turns you on....p.s. this is a booty call
It's OK, I woke up in a drag queen's bed last weekend. It took me forever to get the glitter out of my cleavage.
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