Lets drop out of school and be professionally skinny and drunk
Kicked off drink for Jesus month by puking in my mouth while talking to my priest...real cool
is it bad that the economy has gotten so bad that finding cheap gas gives me the same excitement and joy as finding a hot, blonde haired, blue eyed, tall, athletic single straight guy?
At least the cops kept you away from sleeping with her. Protect and Serve.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm pregaming for my hair cut. Working two jobs definately taught me how to use my time wisely...
Ok, gonna go sleep cuz my brain wants to be smart and not follow my pussy into the danger zone
I just conducted a skype meeting drunk and in the middle of a cornfield. I don't even think they noticed.
I'm disgusted with myself. I feel like I need 10 boxes of Summer's Eve and a baptism.
He called his dick the "gentle giant"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
All I've done is masturbate and drink while being home from college.
How can you tell that you're blacked out ?
You can feel it in your nipples.
I can't control his boners. I can only encourage them.
There’s nothing that says motivation more than watching these little geniuses on Kids Baking Championship New Year’s Day. I’m ready to fuck shit up this year.
I heard Enya coming from steve’s room. I am too high to handle this sudden depth of character
Remember that gum I swallowed 3 days ago? I just threw it up.... whole.
Randomize