Dude I got a text from you at 1:30 last night and you didn't use any vowels
Haha, I didn't want to buy any... we're in a recession you know
Getting drunk in a different country is not a good idea. Lets just say spanish women, 17 yr olds from missouri, prostitutes, and a poodle. I don´t want to leave spain.
oh there is nothing like the 1st beerbong of the school year
I have a drinking game planned. Were gunna watch empire records. Everytime they say rex manning we have to take a shot
I ended up in a shower with 9 people and a bunch of unopened beer last night. I think I got peed on. Hands were everywhere. We sold the peed on beer to people knocking on the hotel room door.
Wow, now I'm sad I didn't go.
DO NOT GO IN OUR BATHROOM. it cannot be unseen
Haha keeping the dream alive until Chinese New Year. I'm jobless with stitches in my face.
All the party invite said was a date and "21 to drink, 18ish to sleep over"
fell down stairs ended up in underground bar now im dancing with trannies and best night of my life. lines of coke
I was out of breath when we were getting started and he offered me his inhaler so he's a keeper
I look at it as community service. He was going through a rough time and I gave him an ego boost. That's how we're going to remember it. I was doing a good deed lol
After I asked for my 6th Gin & Tonic, the look on the flight attendant's face started to make me feel bad about myself.
Worst wingman u don't do ANYTHING but laugh at my incompitant shyness
Sent. All. My. Texts. Like. This. Last. Night. Thank. You. Weed. Also. Had. A. Dream. About. A. Serial. Killer. That. Killed. Everyone. Except. Me. And.
On a scale of 1 to 10, with 1 being “good” and 10 being “banging a student’s father”, how bad is it that I’m banging a student’s father?
Randomize
