If I were a hot girl. I'd whore around, I'd be awesome.
I just used my 7th grade year book to figure out who I hooked up with last night. Being home is magical.
U shoulda just taken her to a stall and banged her and let me watch the game. Some friend u r.
She's the perfect storm when it comes to psycho stalkers
DRUNK CANOEING
Please text me if you survive.
LAND HO BITCH
Too bad they don't have an emoji symbol for condoms and 99 cent tacos
I was so exhausted I thought about using my deep throat spray to stop my coughing.
Look, I'm just saying... paying ur respects to the neighbors who had a death in the family with food u steal from the neighbors having the cookout may result in a negative karma situation.
I just passed a truck with its bed lined with a tarp and filled with water with six dudes chilling in the back driving through campus. That looks fun.
I think they make you graduate because you get too old to go hard and become a risk. homecoming weekend wins again. fuck.
So I was trying to finish off that sick uv whipped and I chased it with yogurt. Not a good idea
You were fine, but your knee injury definitely came from interpretive dancing like a gay fairy with lead wings all around the Mission St BART. Everyone thought you were on drugs.
Is it weird that i want a guy to ask me to homecoming by spelling it out in meatballs?
THATS VERY WEIRD
I can't remember the last time I saw a penis in person that I didn't see a million times on text first
So...#1 on my TO DO list for college is to fuck someone somewhere in the stadium during the homecoming game...you down?
Randomize
