I am doing a scientific study and i need a brief description of the underpants you are wearing
I just ate an adderall and jelly sandwich in front of my mom. Homework time!
my mom just served us mashed potatoes with an ice cream scoop. When I asked her why, she said she thought it would make dinner 'more fancy'...
I know. I just don't want anything else. I have no other desire. Just a ham sandwich.
I honestly don't know what to make of that.
A ham sandwich would be nice.
im already regretting the extreme lack of break up sex that took place
ur roommate just sent me a pic of us fucking. i'm not coming over anymore.
We just took turns doing keg stands. 27 is way too old for this. Out of 5 of us, our best time was 9 seconds.
This guy either needs to stop touching me or buy me another drink.
Are we still banned from the library?
Now I'm at the gym and I never want to leave. It's a combo of adderall and endorphins and I don't want it to go away
Ok, so technically yes she wore a red tank top to the stoplight party. But under it was a yellow bra and green panties.
There is this threesome scene that is literally 10 minutes of straight fucking
Omg so it's educational?
Now after not puking, next step is not to do the accent when immigration says "hello."
Why is the turtle in the toilet again?
Well as I was puking in the tub I put him in there to keep me company but I am almost positive the original setup was him in the tub and me next to the toilet...I hope he likes tequila
I managed to convince her that the egg yolks were actually orange juice and she fell for it
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