So J keeps drinking his last bit of drink, then spitting it out and drinks it again. Savor the flavor?
He set 8 alarms to make sure I took my birth control on time..
My complete lack of self respect has really improved my blow job technique
The stripper on stage Is eating a mozzarella stick while on the pole....that's a new level of I don't give a fuck
Just think of all the blizzard sex people are having right now
The cab driver thought we were passed out so he called a sexline...
I'm pretty sure they had a hash wedding cake. I love college weddings.
Using the random money I found in my bra from Halloween to pay to print my bio notes. I only brought a debit to the bar. College win.
Serious question: when you had my right nipple in your mouth, did my nipple ring have both of the balls on it, or was it missing one. Current situation: missing one.
The object of the game was to pour tequila into a sombrero and drink as much as you can before it leaked through, 'Big Papi' won.
I don't remember much and some girl almost convinced me to jump off the bridge while she held my stuff...
I'm almost too old to be on The Real World but feel like I'm too young to be on The Bachelor and I'm just really confused with my place in life.
I found my limit. I will not, in fact, blow my 78 year old professor for an A in his class.
She said she was sober from drugs for a week. All I heard was Kenny Loggins singing Danger Zone.
you should probably call the Bronx Zoo in the morning to formally apologize
its the right thing to do
Randomize
