Update, blind date is cute and fun.
Scratch that, blind date just threw up.
if being creepy is wrong, then i don't want to be right
Which one of you FUCKERS filled the toilet with soil and planted my mothers daisys in it? NOT FUCKING HAPPY
he pretended not to hear me say our safety word. how do you think I feel?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
decision: in honor of being in new orleans this weekend all my drunk texts will be en francais
For the record, saying you're friends with the owner doesn't work when the owner is the one throwing you out.
I might lose an organ but I've got booze. I'll be fine.
just walked across campus with a bottle of champagne in between my boobs. night two and the quest for classiness is already over
Hooked up with a guy resembling a bearded Cher. I need the lenses on my beer goggles fixed. Pronto.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just woke up and spent the first hour of consciousness throwing up with the Rocky theme song on repeat.
I was thirsty after the sex and it was a long trek back to res so naturally I stole chocolate milk from his fridge as I left
We broke the bed while I was handcuffed to the headboard and let's just say that was a hard one to explain to the RA
And god said thou shalt never deny free booze. And it was good.
You sat down in the middle of the road and started crying. We told you "Get your ass up or we're leaving you here." You replied "They'll findddd meeeeee" and ran after us.
I promise your sink was clogged before I threw up in it.
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