no but I have been chillin' like em' homeboys in the rainforest yo!
Well. Nothing came of that. And to think I manscaped and dusted with gold bond.
I couldnt give him head when all I could hear was his little brother playing the piano and this family singing along to it.
I didn't scare your mother by showing up on the roof, did I?
She was standing in the road flagging traffic in a tshirt and boxers. I didn't stop.
All she wanted was a cigarette
you got me arrested i just think that goes without question you owe me a blowjob
I'm having Vietnam flashbacks. This Kid I hooked up with is speaking in class and I keep experiencing the terror.
As a matter of fact, I am on the treadmill with the Bottle of UV Blue as we speak.....
So the bitch asked me if I wanted the name brand or the generic contraceptive. Does it look like I want to be generically pregnant?
Just saw a guy with two baby turtles sneaking into the building
having flashbacks of licking salt of your dick for my shot of tequila
My boobs are hoarders, they steal food and hide it. Greedy bitches.
I've been in town for almost 36 hrs and I haven't made out with a stranger yet - I consider THAT a record!
I’m appalled by how severely I lower my standards when I’m horny & impaired
There. There is gum on my butt cheek IT IS NOT MINE
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