Also my back is semi rug burned and I'm holding you fully responsible.
I would love to give you more rug burn
Everything that you guys said happened came back to me. like a tidal wave of regret.
please stop judging me for buying a handle of soco on a thursday at 10am. it was on sale, i'm thinking of my future.
If a video of someone that looks like me banging that chick on the hood of her car in some parking lot suddenly shows up on the web... let me know, I gotta see how that turned out.
I don't know if I want to cry scream puke or go somewhere and drink more. This is such a weird emotion.
don't worry about it. We passed around the "get jeff bail" can 10 min. After you left. We currently have around $400. May I say that people here at the dorms really love you.
Ok, Jen and I are going out tonight and getting rowdy. I think you and Steph need to come. I understand if you can't, but not going out means you're automatically obligated to post bail. If necessary.
Having a vagina does not stop me from believeing my balls are bigger than yours.
Considering that your "hello" was replaced with "Fuck yo couch," I'm not surprised that you have a black eye.
I'm drunk, laying in bed, eating macaroni salad. I dropped a piece and tried to pick it up with a fork. My cleavage is bleeding and I haven't been laid yet. Heeeyyyy!!!
Then when he got home he face timed me and showed me his balls
He noticed my new Lipstick so later tonight it's going to be on his dick.
Oh you mean the girl that gave me a black eye when I told her I liked her fake eyelashes?
I was just told I’m pretty enough to be a catfish. This made me so happy...
You think I could convince him that having sex with another girl isn't cheating?
Randomize
