If a girl drunk dials you she's at least entertained the idea of sleeping w/ you correct?
YES
i get turned down more than a collar. where are the desperate bitches i need to crawl to them
after everytime she pucked, she insisted on us all giving her high fives
Oh this totally just became legit. My "boss" is puking outside my car right now. I win again.
both roomates are passed out on the floor. I feel like I'm missing out on crucial bonding time by sleeping in my bed.
If I start taking birth control 8 days after we had sex do you think it'll stop the baby from being made?
today's the one month anniversary of me not giving anyone head. can you tell me you're proud
it's sad that this is a milestone
Did you not learn anything for "HERPES SCARE 2010".........
So the contents found in my winter coats this year: coat 1, condom and 10$. Coat 2, condom and 75$ check. Coat 3, 2.05$ and a sunflower seed.
Obviously coat 3 had the best time since you used the condom and all of the money
Dude, you're only mentioning the Bro Code so I can't get any
I wouldn't call that a crush. It was more of a minor brain aneurism.
i just got banned from the m&m's website for trying to get poon slayer written on my custom order
And then he said, "let's have sex and I'll send you home with enchiladas."
also I saw his dick in the morning light and it was glorious. Like staring upon your birthday cake you ordered from heaven and going " can't wait to eat that later"
i had to win in rock paper scissors, get called a fat whore, and make two dudes get in a fight so we could call next game on the table and you make zero cups. thanks asshole.
Randomize
