i don't like sucking hair
I'm convinced her vagina is similar to chernobyl, but I want to visit it for the novelty value anyway.
naighbors jacking off again. i swear its his friday night ritual, its like he knows the night wont be ending in his favor
I just read the lonely terrorist on nwa had 40 more friends than me on facebook
29 Petty People Reveal The Shallow Reasons They Turned Someone Down
can you go into shock from having too many orgasms? i think i went into shock.
Just caused a nice traffic jam while trying to park at Costco. Too high to drive.
You insisted we put glow sticks on you so that we didn't lose you if you went pee in the dark.
I was woken up at 4am by a stranger shaking my foot who said I looked like I needed a cigarette.
New justification for blow: drug week; 'how it's made'
21 Horribly Evil Pranks To Play On Your Drunk Friends
I wore sweatpants. When I show up to a booty call in sweatpants there's your warning
He told me I was 100% better then porn then passed out nto the cake
The drag queen we did coke with is going to be on Ru Paul's drag race. I feel so proud.
I did the walk of shame this morning and his mom hugged me in the driveway
If I ever go to jail it will be because of you, I can feel it.
The candles are lit, the magic circle is drawn, now all we need to do is get naked and see how many orgasms we can manage.