just did a line in a complete hula outfit off a chick in a devil costume. do you think hell will be this good?
i friday night watching house. god, i need a life, friends, and a legitimate fake id.
i just woke up in the woods behind my house in handcuffs and a dan marino jersey ive never seen before
DO NOT FUCK HIM ON MY BEAN BAG CHAIR
after giving each other head, we had a really nice post-oral heart to heart. found out he lost his virginity in a threesome.
If a "boob" guy and an "ass" guy are discussing which you are better qualified for....just let them
She gained 35 lbs and has an ankle bracelet, time for new booty call.
she sent me pictures of 3 different vaginas and if I could pick which one was hers i could sleep with her.
I was always good at matching as a child.
I woke up to find his roommate face down on the couch with no pants on, with a sticky note that said "was lost but now am found"
we're the same shoe size and he owns more pairs of heels than i do. this could be the beginning of a beautiful friendship
He made me put my cow print vest and my cowboy hat from my ' sheriff woody' costume and said I'll show you a woody. What I charmer huh!? I love make up sex
No. DON'T DO IT. Friends don't let friends fuck clowns.
My mom is dancing slutty on the bar I need more drinks to be ok with this
i think ive been high everyday since ive met you
Also I like oatmeal more than sex.
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