"what do u think of parents raising kids to be peeping toms" said guy on bus 2 me
can't decide if i want to get drunk or coked for this harry potter thing.. it is kind of long
aren't you going with children?
While she was crying about breaking up, he looked at her through his fork and said "of course she's upset, she's in jail." Having sex with him tonight.
Yeah, all the sudden I heard a loud "ding" and realized I had been passed out on the dorm elevator for about an hour....
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I woke up to you in just boxers at my door at 7a.m. with you saying how many squrriels you counted on the walk back, then you made me penis shaped pancakes
the only compliment i could think of for this chick was that she looked 'moderately attractive'
I had to close one eye to read the questions on my final this morning. That hungover.
At one point you starting double fisting oreos in your mouth confused about how you got out of the car
The vagina on Hilton Head is mighty fine this time of year.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I kept calling him escargot instead of Estaban..I don't think that was the wisest choice.
That awesome feeling when you are pooping on the same toilet that nobel laureates have pooped on
I was seriously concerned she had died since she wasn't moving at all, but then I asked here where she was last night and her response was to hip thrust the air.
A dick pic is not a proper way to say I'm sorry
How's Vegas?
Woke up with a sculpture of my own head. Been trying to find Ashley for two days. so pretty not too bad.
I have decided that I would still fuck Harrison Ford even though he is old as fuck now. Do you think it would kill him?
Most likely. But I bet he'd do a bang up job of it before he died.
He absolutely would.
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