the 24 hour champagne diet aint going so well
We had sex in the tent after his 6th beer and while we were at it we had conversations with the people outside the tent.
Drunk me cleaned my room for me. Needless to say our relationship has improved greatly
I have a broken liver
I see that the whole "let's take a break from drinking" has worked out really well for us.
He crawled over to me grabbed my boob asked me if I liked cats and then passed out. If that's really my RA, it's gonna be a long year
He was just lying on my lap in the backseat screaming how if the cops came he was a blanket.
On a better note: I'm on pace for 730 female produced orgasms in 2013.
So nowhere in the dress code does it forbid me from showing up to City Hall in a gorilla suit to meet the mayor.
A nap. You broke your hand napping in Vegas.
Only I could get hit on by homophobic straight guys in a drag bar.
She said she is going to be sex-slave version of Princess Leia for halloween. You think there is any way I could pull off an attractive Jabba suit?
I think he fucked my hip out of place.
I need to go home for the safety of everyone in a 10 mile radius, especially me
its a recording of you guys having sex?!
its actually 30 minutes of him begging and then 2 minutes of sex.
I just licked honey off my own tit. Is there anything about that which doesn't SCREAM single???
Randomize