Is it sad that I'm on the stopduiaz.com website and there is a cute boy but it will never work between us because hes in jail for 17.5 years?
Um.. is it mean if I say yes?
How would my first penpal letter even go? "Hey saw you on stopduiaz.com, sucks you killed that motorcyclist. Whats your favorite thing to do on the weekend?"
so I smoked with the leasing agent of the apartment complex. Of corse I am going to take this one
I threw up into my coffee this morning.
Throw up on the ground, people dancing to loud Bollywood music, seats literally missing. Fuck I hate public transit
Did you not learn anything for "HERPES SCARE 2010".........
Why are you always at the walk in clinic, Lady Chlamydia?
You're not allowed to make that my permanent nickname.
She didn't need to know her brother was thrown out of a bar for getting head on the dance floor. You're a shit head.
Huh interesting. Well thats too bad. Did he catch on?
I doubt it. After sex he sat there naked until the episode of fresh prince (which had JUST started) was over.
So your bra was hanging in the Christmas tree last night at some point I think
Some girl at my gym just tried to casually drop the fact she can kegel 3 lbs...
it is basically gonna be an ugly Christmas sweater rave
Yeah. I couldn't figure out why my toes hurt. Apparently, the guy I was dancing with, kept running them over with his wheelchair.
forgot to tell you your neighbor walked out of her house this morning just as I was leaving shirtless
Yeah, he hid all the toilet paper and took a video of me looking for it before I shit my pants. Definitely playing that clip at our wedding.
just found out that my aunt grows weed. today is a good day to be me.
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