I'm going to jail i love you
I am going to be the most sexually active ladybug that he has ever seen
So im using the back of a keystone box as notecard for my presentation
all ten of us were sitting in his room with the lights off and staring at his colorful moving screensaver for two hours. That high.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Um he just came into the kitchen naked to get her purse or something?
did you by any chance leave me that 7 minute long voicemail of you running and constantly tripping into bushes?
How the fuck did you end up in a tree? With multiple people?
He gave up on mugging us when Dave wouldn't stop laughing. He was wiggling his finger at the knife and making baby noises and giggling. The guy just walked away.
He lasted about 30 seconds then said you can't win them all. But then he made me pancakes so it's okay. We shall call him mancakes.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just woke up with an eye that wont open, a half eaten piece of pizza on my chest and a raging boner.
It's not really the holidays until I raid the medicine cabinet. Happy hydrocodone to me
And a merry methadone to all
We'll just play it by vagina and see where it leads us
He hasn't touched a vagina in two and a half years. THIS IS WAY TOO MUCH PRESSURE TO BE UNDER
The hardest part about being a child of divorce is when you're at your dad's house but your condoms are at your mom's house.
Is 28 too old to get fingered in Centennial Park? Asking for a friend.
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