well, atleast the road to alcoholism is fun.
I had a new years resolution not to be a whore anymore, but I think I'm gonna wait till 2011
She rolled a blunt with one hand...and instantly I had a boner, I'm going to marry this girl.
Is sexting at a funeral morally wrong?
Just tried to chase Captain Morgan with water...this whole drinking alone business is getting harder to do.
Dude. The walls are totally staring at me right now. I told you this was a bad idea.
I am at 2.05 miles in under 11 minutes. So either this thing is broke or I should always work out wasted.
noooo, I woke up on his pack porch and the SUN WAS RISING. I saw red lights everywhere and heard sirens so I just ran for my life.
No idea how he made them, but vodka water balloons were a horrible idea.
Your dad just texted me? He said I needed to holler at him when I get up tomorrow. I honestly thought you had somehow gone to jail.
I've never wanted to punch a 94 year old woman in the vagina, and then call her next of kin to tell them I just muff punched their Gam Gam until today.
I just realized now that you're pregnant we can't use alcohol as currency
It tasted better than Jesus's hair.
Legal advice please. Can you sue someone for jerking off to photos of you?
Well... Chad blew off half of his hand last night. We were able to find most of it.
Randomize
