We made it safely. Thanks for the call though.
Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
But he was like 75 and lives right near mom and dad. Not a threat at all.
i get turned down more than a collar. where are the desperate bitches i need to crawl to them
I can't get out of the parking garage so now I'm staying downtown....Typical
saturday- my day is open, my legs are not. you in?
well apparently not.
We had sex in the bathroom. Then he told me I could watch him pee.
Drunk me cleaned my room for me. Needless to say our relationship has improved greatly
It's like someone is grabbing my scrodum with pliers and just hanging there.
there is vodka in my soul right now. The vapor is coming out my nose.
So I have a scar from when the stripper tore off my underwear .... Best birthday ever
I can't figure out if I'm dying from all of the booze still in my system, or from the cement wall.
Would be in best interest to sanitize the DVDs
i swear i just dislocated a hip staying still
She told me she was the Publishers Clearing House of Dicks. Two dicks a day, everyday for life.
I don't work there anymore. If they had Prince themed dildo parties i never would have quit
Taking a shit in a Texas 7/11... not accepting phone calls now lol
Randomize
